Last night, alone on a Saturday night with a bottle of Merlot and some cigarettes (yes, I started smoking again a bit), Mr. Gehry ended it.
I wanted him to end it last week. He couldn't.
Now it's official. It's for the best. But right now I feel hurt, angry, sad and stressed. I'm reacting to this, naturally. I shouldn't have to go through this shit over and over.
I deserve better.
And what kills me is that I really cared about him. And thought he was going to be different than all the fags out there. But he turned out to be another giant shallow fag with ridiculous ideals.
It's his loss. He lost someone who would've been really awesome. I know that now and no fucking guy is ever going to validate my existence. Or bring me down. I have worked too damn hard to get to where I am.
So three cheers to loves lost, loves gained and a lifetime ahead of me to figure this shit out.
He definitely broke my heart. But I'm going to get my friends to break his face.
